Saturday, May 26, 2001


I have a lot of pals.

For instance, last night I was really discouraged, so I wrote an email to my friends from college. I got back several replies, all very encouraging. One of my friends talked about going to Dallas for the weekend and "jamming" with her friends. She plays guitar and violin (and very well!). Another friend reminded me of a tennis game we played with some friends last spring. I didn't play too well, but oh well.

I have many friends online too. Lisa has been very encouraging to me during the whole Kaycee bit. So has halcyon and BWG. Two great guys. :-)

It just goes to show that no matter what you are going through, you have a lot of people who love you.

Hasta luego!

P.S. I got an inflatable tater tot today. I got it at the Sonic drive in. Cool, huh?

1. Hot baths (ahhhhhh)
2. People who come in right before close with a party of 15, stay until 30 minutes after close, make all these complex orders, and only leave $2 tip
3. Peanut butter toast (yum)
4. How soft a puppy's belly is
5. Tennis
6. Breaking dinner bowls (potato salad)
7. Catsup stains on my blue jeans
8. Cold Dr. Pepper
9. My wonderful friends from college, who send me encouraging email

Email Solicitations

Don't you just love it when some company/person sends you an email soliciting something, provides an email address so you can remove your name from your list, and then, when you mail them asking to be removed, THE ADDRESS DOESN'T WORK?


This happened to me tonight. Someone solicited a mortgage from me (like I can afford a house). I emailed this email to the company:

Dear (Person)
Will you please remove me from your mailing list? I am much too young to even consider buying a house. Not to mention, way too broke.
Thanks for understanding! :-)

I pushed the Send button, and the MESSAGE BOUNCED!!! Gah!

Ah, well.

Hasta luego!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thursday, May 24, 2001

My Quote about Debbie (of Kaycee Fame)

I put a quote on Metafilter (back when it was working) about the whole Kaycee Nicole situation. I had a lot to say about her, but this quote summed it up nicely. Now, I am gonna repeat it, just for posterity's sake:

Debbie: You are the weakest link.

Hasta luego, folks.....

Wednesday, May 23, 2001

I Hate T-1 Servers >:-(

What is up with Blogspot anyway?!!! I am sick of not being able to see my website.


Tuesday, May 22, 2001


Today, I was walking to work, when I saw these wonderful butterflies.

They were everywhere. Some were orange, others were white. The white ones were my favorite. There were thousands of them--in my front yard, in flower gardens, on the roadside flower patches.

Today, I decided to walk through this patch of wildflowers. These were the gorgeous Black Eyed Susans you often see on roadsides. As I walked, I kept noticing these butterflies.

And it occurred to me how hectic my life had become during the school year. Classes, projects, papers, activities, time with friends--you name it.

My main priority during the school year was getting some sleep. Just a little bit. If I got five hours, I considered myself doing good.

But what have I gained from that? Nothing but a bit of exhaustion.

I took my time wading through the butterflies. I decided that life at a slower pace may not be such a bad thing.

Hasta luego!

Eric at referred me!!!! Yay!!!!

Thanks Eric!!!!


Monday, May 21, 2001

Shameless Plea for Email

Please you guys. If you see this blog, please let me know!!! Email me!!! Please!!!
I'm begging you.
Yes, I will answer you.
And Yes, I am real. (Just had to put that in.)
New Job: Lessons I Have Learned

1. Some people do not tip 15%. Deal with it.
2. BBQ sauce will never, never come out of your clothes.
3. Some people don't know, uhm, where to use the bathroom. (Don't ask.)
4. Waiting on 4 tables at a time is normal.
5. This job is exhausting.

All in all, not a bad night. Now, if only I can make a decent wage......

Hasta luego!

Sunday, May 20, 2001

On To Better Things

Today, I went out to eat with my mom, stepdad, and my grandparents. It was awesome.

We went to Cracker Barrel. I ordered one of their awesome grilled chicken tenderloin sandwiches and a side of fried okra. While we waited for our food, my Pe-pa noticed some farm tools above where we were sitting. He quizzed us as to what they were.

I was like, "Pe-pa, I was raised in the Internet age. I have no clue what any of those things were."

He kinda rolled his eyes. Ah, well.

We got our food, and it was delish. I also got some ice cream for dessert. Yummmm.....

Afterwards, we went into their gift shop. I decided to buy a Beanie Baby, since it had been so long since I had bought one. I looked around, and found this awesome butterfly. I had to buy him. So I did.

So, we get home, and my grandparents let us in on the lastest family gossip. (No, I won't repeat any of it.) Eventually, I wander in here, and that's when I found out about the whole Kaycee thing (see previous entry). Sigh.

But it was a fun afternoon, all in all. It was great to get into real life....

Hasta luego!
The Saga of Kaycee


I can honestly say that I have rarely felt this saddened.

I feel kind of dumb, too.

But then again, that's natural, right?

Here's the story from my point of view....I'll start from the beginning...

It started with the OSU plane crash a few months ago. As most of you know, ten people associated with the program were killed. One of those people was a popular sportscaster that I had watched since I was about 9 years old.

For some reason, I was stunned. This guy felt like he was a part of my family, even though I had never met him. (Yes, call me sentimental, but that's how I really felt.)

One day, I was looking for some info about the crash on the web. I came across Kaycee's blog. SHe had discussed the crash briefly in her blog.

I read some of her other entries, and I became fascinated. This was a girl who had gone through so much, and she seemed like a wonderful young lady.

I started reading her site every day. I read the archives. I even took some of the songs lyrics she published and printed them out. She was a comfort and an inspiration to me, in a time where I needed both of these things.

I was continually inspired by this young lady. When it became evident that she would die soon, I prayed for her and Debbie. When she died, I was devastated.

Now, this story comes out. Seems that Debbie, whoever she was, made "Kaycee" up from the composites of three people she knew. It was actually a truth-based fiction.

At first, when the conspiracy theory started, I denied it. I wholeheartedly believed that Kaycee was real. I still believe that she was based on a real person, and real events.

But I can't help but feel a little betrayed. I was lead to believe that I was reading about one real person, in real time. I do feel embarrasment, too. However, my strongest feeling is sadness. I feel for those people who were closest to Kaycee, who had far more emotional investment than I did.

I want to make several points:

1. I do not regret believing in Kaycee. I was misled, but that's okay. I will get over it. I would not, however, try to question a person's life without firm evidence. That evidence was not provided to my satisfaction, no matter what others think, until Debbie herself and BWG provided us with the real story.
2. Neither do I regret asking my friends to pray for her family after she "died". Again, I was going on what I believed to be true. I will NEVER regret asking others to care about other people.
3. Above all, I don't regret having faith. Sure, it is disappointing to be wrong, but again, I will get over it. However, if I had made hurtful comments to others who had really suffered a loss and then turned out to be wrong, I would not be able to forgive myself.

So please, people. DO NOT LOSE FAITH IN OTHERS BECAUSE OF THIS. This event was tragic, either way you see it. However, it would be even more tragic if people started not to trust others because of things like this. It's like I had told many people. The benefits of having faith far outweigh the costs. Closing your heart to others is far more harmful. Trust me. I know this for a fact.

In closing, I will say that, as far as my blog goes, the referrences to Kaycee and this case will remain on the site. This is because she was a real part of my life at that time, and to change my entries would be like changing the past. You can't change the past. You can learn from it, but you can't change it. I will keep those entries as is so that others can see and learn from this incident. They can also see that I am who I really claim to be, and I don't try to rewrite history to make myself look better.

Hasta luego.


Don't Stop Believin'

(a.k.a. Soapbox No. Whatever)
You know, I used to be a cynic.

Anytime someone told me something, I would be like, "Prove it." I was distrustful, and I got suspicious really easily.

As a result, I was not able to develop true friendships with people. The few friendships I have had were superficial.

When I came to college, several things happened to me. Things that have shown me the good side of people.

And I learned that faith is very important. Faith in others results in wonderful friendships. Faith in yourself helps you grow as a person.

There have been times I have been burned. Those times, my trust in others have been severely tested. However, I have developed great friendships thanks to my developing trust in others. I would not trade those for anything.

Even if I am wrong to have faith in something, I will never, repeat NEVER, regret having faith. Better to hope and be disappointed than to have no hope and not live.

Hasta luego.

BTW, the title is also the title of a song by Journey. It's a really cool song, too. Listen to it sometime. :-)